Slipping Back
by carling
Summary: Kirsten. The temptation is always there. One Shot


**_I came up with this while chatting with _Kerche_, this is for you hun! Hope it's what you expected! (Spoiler alert – Kirsten crying photo)_**

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Slipping Back**

Sandy sat on the end of his bed shocked. Not many times he had been rendered speechless, but this was one of them.

_This wasn't meant to happen anymore. I thought we had gotten through this._ He thought to himself, the few syllables running through his mind.

He sat there as time came to a pause, the eerie silence reflecting his shock, his regret.

_Had I not done enough, was there something more that I should have done? Was there some more that I could have done?_

But he knew that the answer lay far from him and that he was going to need to try harder if he wanted to break this thing.

His hands tightened around the cool glass as he stared into its clear contents and wondered to himself.

_How could you put yourself through this?_

He needed to find out.

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His train of thoughts were broken as he heard the faint footsteps drawing nearer to the bedroom.

Kirsten entered the room quietly as if treading on glass. She glanced up at Sandy and from the moment her eyes met his she knew that he had found it. Her eyes ventured downwards and the bottle wedged between his strained hands confirmed her suspicions.

Once again it had come back to haunt her. As far away as she ran, no matter where, it always managed to find a way to get back near her and tempt her.

Guilt coursed through her body as her legs numbly carried her to the sofa at the end of the bed when they finally collapsed letting her body sink into the cushions. As Sandy stood up from his place on the opposite side of the bed she felt another ripple of guilt surge through her body as she let the tears she had held in for so long finally stream down her face.

She leant into his chest, hoping to find some kind of comfort there, and he ran his hand along her back trying to soothe her. For a while she sat there silently with tears consistently running down her face and her forehead pressed up against his chest.

As disappointed he was, Sandy could take it no longer and knelt down so that he was face to face with her. While trying to hush her with hope that it may cease her incessant sobbing he gently wiped away the tears falling from her eyes with his two fingers. With those two salty fingers he then lifted her chin up to face him so that she could not escape eye contact. When they finally met he questioned her.

"Why?"

She gasped a breath in before answering.

"I don't know another way to cope. I didn't know what else I was to do."

"Kirsten, honey, I'm here now. I'm here to help you cope. I'm going to help you through this."

"I know, it's just hard."

"Well no one ever said it was going to be easy. I just need you to know that I'm always here for you and that I'm never going to leave your side."

"Thank you." She whispered as she searched for through his eyes. She searched for the husband she felt that she had lost over a year ago and there she found him, staring back at her. She thought to herself.

_Is he going to send me back there? I wish I could stay here and just be with him, I need him so much now._

As they continued to stared deep into each others eyes, amazed at what they now saw after such a challenging year, Sandy could hear her thoughts and see her dreams.

"I'm not going to send you back to rehab though. I'd rather you stay here with me, I need you so much." He paused for a while. "I noticed you didn't open the bottle." He questioned slightly.

"Yea. For now at least."

"Do you think you would have?"

"I honestly don't know. It would seem kind of foreign to but it's just that this is how I've dealt with everything in the past year, I had no idea what else to do."

"Just remember sweetie, I'm here to support you and make sure you get through this. I love you."

"I love you too. And I'm sorry. It's just, you don't understand what it feels like."

"I want to. I want to know."

They sat there until her sobbing gently subsided and they lay there longer, relishing in the hope that they may just get through this. That they may just get through this together.

_**Okay so I hope you liked it. I definitely don't think that it's my best writing but I promised that I would post it tonight so here it is! Please review!**_


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